A place you stay eventually becomes the place you are living. Then, it becomes a home. In some cases, it is one of many homes. From my experience as a backpacker, this can happen in as few as 3 days or take years to occur. Recently, I have found myself wondering what home means. I think about my first few months in Denmark. I remember how I felt before settling in Hanoi.
Today marks just over 6 months since I moved to Hanoi, Vietnam. From day 4 (my last entry) to day 5 in the life of a teacher nearly three months have passed. Here is an attempt to re-count some of the adventures and memories made along the way.
My first few days in Hanoi were spent in a backpacker’s hostel in the center of Old Quarter. By almost all accounts, Hoan Kiem is the area where most potential expats begin a trip to the city. An Egyptian teacher introduced me to the area. He was kind enough to show me some aspects of what makes Hanoi a magical city. Now six months later, I find myself calling upon moments of magic as I have begun to settle in Hanoi.
These days, I find it difficult to remember distinct days. The pace of life begins to hasten when one settles into a new way of life. My mundane here in Hanoi is like nothing I could have imagined. Most days, I wake up between 8 and 10 AM. I teach my first class or prepare to teach afternoon lessons. The school is in Ha Dong, a nearby district of Hanoi. I take one of several daily motorbike rides via Grab or Be and just like that, my day begins. I am off among a school of fish’ (the affectionate name given to the organized chaos that is Hanoian traffic). My first lesson is usually for a smaller center where I teach English to children ages 12-13 through a series of games, readings, and listening activities. Once mid-afternoon approaches (12 to 2 pm), the Vietnamese observe an extended lunch break. During this time, I usually run errands. These errands include going to the local pharmacy and heading to Big C for groceries. I also buy flowers from a lady down the road. Another errand is grabbing a smoothie or an iced yogurt drink (sữa chua) from a cafe in Dong Da, Cau Giay, or Ba Dinh (areas of Hanoi). Recently, I have been trying to be more disciplined about going to the gym or the pool for a swim. After lunch, I head to school to teach grades 6 and 7 or begin a series of private lessons. During these private lessons, I teach a range of topics to ESL students. These topics include exam preparation and English Literature, such as poems and short stories. I also cover health, how to talk about the weather, and more. In the evening, if I get off work before 8 PM, I might stop by Hoam Kiem for a drink. I may also choose to sit by Westlake lake in Tay Ho. Afterward, I prepare for the next day. Every day brings new insights, challenges, and questions. I am endlessly fortunate. I remain aware of the fact that I am teaching amazing students ages 12 to 45.
Late last month, I found myself eager to break from routine. Often described as plan-oriented, the way I went about the trip was unusual. Around 7 o’clock on a Wednesday morning, I rushed to get pho after heading back to my apartment. I quickly found a route and went to the bus station.
Soon enough, I was immersed among the grand trees of Ba Vi. The thick air of Hanoi was replaced with blue skies. Families sat among the grass taking in the sun beneath the canopy of trees. Being in nature without a city in view gives me an indescribable feeling. I have longed for this since a visa run to Luang Prabang, Laos. Since coming to Hanoi, I’ve gained a greater respect for my need to be in nature regularly. When I lived in Seattle, parks and easy access to mountain trails were essential. Waterfalls have also allowed me to appreciate what it would be like to live elsewhere.
The above image is the city of Luang Prabang as captured from a mountain-top temple. One of my most vivid memories of the city remains my first visit here. I awoke early to give alms to local monks dressed in orange robes. As dawn broke, I made my way to the mountain. I sat in the temple for easily an hour. I have never been particularly spiritual or religious. However, I found something universal about finding calm in a temple. I was surrounded by golden statues and offerings. Briefly, I watched a woman enter with a caged bird. Although a common practice in Buddhism, I had yet to see the release of a bird in real life. I watched intently as she said a few words and let the bird go. From my understanding, one of the major tenants of Buddhism is to live with non-attachment. Often confused with passivity or indifference, non-attachment in both Buddhism and Existentialism is finding peace with life as it occurs. It is different from living reactivity.
In the last few months, I have focused on living in peace. I have stopped living for things that provoke a response. Upon coming to Asia, I wanted to develop my inner sense of self. While this still remains true, I have gained a respect for progress not being bound by place. I fell into a dangerous trap when I first came to Vietnam. I had traveled extensively in Europe and SE Asia before this. I came looking for a ‘fix’. Albeit, nothing was broken. I believed the questions I pondered in the States would disappear. I thought my uncertainties about my potential, future, and goals would vanish simply because I crossed an ocean. Now almost 6 months into my time in Vietnam, I have learned to work toward peace within myself. I find the quality of life to be good. I am fortunate enough to have time for self-reflection. However, I often long to return to hiking trails and mountain peaks.
(I do not own the right to this image)
Soon after visiting Laos, I ventured to Ba Vi. Then, I adjusted to life in a new city. It was time for one of my dads to visit~! It was surreal to see family again after 9 months. I am not a particularly homesick-prone person. However, my bizarre family and Seattle are where I came from. They hold the key to what I learned growing up. They remain how and where I learned early life lessons. My family supported my desire to travel. They gave me the tools to obtain this goal. Without their support, I would likely not be in Vietnam at 23. The mere idea of living abroad seemed out-of-grasp in the early days of my emerging passion for travel. Now, I simply feel gratitude for the life I have created here in Hanoi. Every day, I recognize how I got here. Most of the time, the road between ‘Day 4’ and ‘Day 5’ seems wildly undefined. I am settling into myself. This is something that cannot be defined by place.
Stay tuned for some travel stories from Asia and beyond in addition to random writings. For the foreseeable future, I will be in Hanoi. However, I am so pleased to note that I will be visiting Taiwan and Japan in 2020. There will be a myriad of other adventures that will no doubt be had here in Vietnam.
Stampchaser Photography 